The Compton Cookout Clowns

Less than two weeks ago a wily group of collegiate sycophants congregated just a mile from the University of California at San Diego in chic La Jolla, for a "Compton Cookout."

Hours from the heart of LA with 40s flowing and extra-large shirts in the triple "x", these prestigious college clowns walked, talked, and acted, every bit of "black" as MTV has taught them to be.  All they forgot were they're clown-shoe kicks in patent leather and rainbow afros.

Since then, the racially insensible party has created a maelstrom of gossip on the campus, through the wires, and in print.

Some have described the party as "racist", others "intolerant" or "hateful," but no one has properly labeled this white-bred suburban-sheltered catastrophe for what it was...stupid.

Yet to a Southern California native of Generation Y, this comes as no surprise; I grew up with these idiots.  And one thing you get use to quick around here is stupidity, and it is just as it does.

Allegedly organized by, Jiggaboo Jones, the event can't necessarily be deemed racist.  Just take a few moments to check this fool.  Though dogs eat dogs, they don't hate on each they feed off each other.

After some laughs of my own I collected my senses and gave Jigga a good look.  One thing is definitely certain with this guy, his blacksploitation accent's as fake as those Jheri curls.  What the shit is a "nehigga" @ 1:19, can't you pronounce none Jigga?

Time for some pull-quotes obtained from the invitation; just goes to show these kids never been to no hood.

"All males to be rockin Jersey's, stuntin' up in ya White T...anything FUBU, Ecko, Rockawear, High/low top Jordans or Dunks, Chians, Jorts, stunner shades, 59 50 hats, Tats, etc."

"For those who are unfamiliar with ghetto chicks - Ghetto chicks usually have gold teeth, start fights and drama, and wear cheap clothes - they consider Baby Phat to be high class and expensive couture.  They also have short, nappy hair, and usually wear cheap weave, usually in bad colors, such as purple or bright red."

"They look at act smiliar to Shenaynay, and speak very loudly, while rolling their neck, and waving their finger in your face."

"Ghetto chicks have a very limited vocabulary, and attempt to make up for it, by forming new words, such as "constipulated", or simply cursing persistently.

"Several of the regents condos will be teaming up to house this monstrosity, so travel house to house and experience the various elements of life in the ghetto." 

 I have not a clue how the authors of this got into a UC, but a few things are clear.  In the perpetually sheltered minds of these idiots; to be a ghetto chick is to imitate Martin Lawrence cross dressing, Anglish don't need no proper punctuation, and a condo cookout on a Monday afternoon with no food but all you can drink is a great way to experience ghetto life.

Do us all a favor before you leave that university Compton Cookout Clowns, acid wash your genes.  You have a great molecular biology program there, they'll help clean your slate for all humanity.